Again with the LOSE, NHL Marketing.
January 7, 2008 | Filed in: Uncategorized

Dear RBK, NHL Shop, and all y’all boys out there in charge of girly jerseys.

I do like the fact that I can now get a girly jersey in not pink, so thanks for listening that far. However, I beg to differ with the fact that a girl with a 44 inch bust has to get an XXL. Seriously? I’m a men’s medium and a women’s XXL? Okay, you may be working on the “standard” sizes, as you’ve also got them labled by size (8, 10, 12, whatever,) but I happen to know that this 44 inch bust can fit in a size 12 shirt. Your XXL is labled “16.” WRONG. And while I like the fact that it’s only $90 for the girly jersey customized, you’re only screenprinting them? That’s crap, yo.

All I want is a jersey that might not make me look quite so like a walking square, but that I’m also confident that the lettering and logos will stay on. Let me show you my screenprinted T-shirt collection. Homie ain’t payin’ 90 bucks for a name and number that will crack off and look like butt within the year. Homie would, however, be willing to pay more like $120 for stitched on names.

Really. Is it SO HARD to get this right? Have you had NO focus groups of female fans? Do I REALLY need to come work for your apparel marketing department and beat sense into you monkeys?


Dear Brooks Orpik,
I’m trying to get your jersey, really I am. These tools aren’t making it easy on this budget or in this body, however. If you could find it in your heart to call my ticket for the Shirts Off Our Backs, that’d be swell. I’ll even bring you chocolate. Or make you cookies. Chocolate cookies.


All content © 2008